Proud to be perfectly imperfect
The wing mirror of an old rusty car
Off the back of a recent LinkedIn comment from Professor Donald Maclean about how much he values imperfection I’ve been ruminating on the subject. As someone who’s body has been through rather a lot in the past few years, I’m perhaps more conscious than most of just how scarred and imperfect I’ve become. I’ve also got the joy of being a woman in her mid 50s who’s been physically nudged past the point that even a filter can do much to save. Of course its not just physical imperfection we wrangle with, with the constant thrum of A.I. in my ears I can’t help wondering when we’ll all be replaced by a more perfect version of ourselves, when A.I. will auto-correct me into oblivion, or will it?
Donald’s aside about preferring imperfection warmed me into remembering a comment by the superb disabled dancer and choreographer Claire Cunningham. I was working on a Radio 4 talk with Claire when she told how she’d been approached to choreograph for an able-bodied dance company, a request she politely declined because working with their bodies was frankly “a bit boring”.
So the following is a little mull over why as humans we should be proud to be perfectly imperfect and actually there’s good evidence that most of us prefer each other that way anyway…
The Surprising Value of Imperfection
It’s easy to think of imperfection as a negative trait. We’re conditioned to strive for flawlessness: in our work, our appearance, and even in our relationships. But as much as we might admire perfection, there’s growing evidence that imperfection is not only natural, it’s valuable.
Studies show that humans are actually drawn to things that have imperfections. Whether it’s in art, design, or personal connections, flaws can make things more appealing, relatable, and even beautiful.
Research: Why Imperfection Resonates
The Flaw Effect: The "flaw effect" is a phenomenon where imperfections make something more interesting or engaging. According to research in the field of psychology, people tend to be drawn to things that are imperfect because they feel more authentic. This has been studied in areas like art and design, where the absence of perfection can add character or emotional depth.
A 2017 study published in Psychological Science found that people often rate objects or works of art that have slight imperfections as more attractive than those that are flawless. This might be why we’re often drawn to handmade or vintage items—they come with a history and a sense of individuality, not a mass-produced sheen of perfection.
Perfection vs. Imperfection in Relationships: In the realm of human connections, imperfections are essential. Psychologist Brené Brown has long championed the idea of “vulnerability,” arguing that the willingness to show our imperfections is the key to forming meaningful relationships. We connect better when we allow ourselves to be human, flaws and all.
Think about how we relate to celebrities. We don’t just love them for their flawless performances or pristine public images, we’re drawn to their struggles and the moments when they show their vulnerability. This is why social media platforms, where people share both their highs and their lows, have become so incredibly popular. Imperfection creates relatability.
Imperfection in History and Pop Culture
The Japanese Art of Kintsugi:
One of the most profound cultural examples of embracing imperfection is the Japanese art of Kintsugi, where broken pottery is repaired with gold, silver, or platinum. Instead of hiding the flaws, this technique highlights them, making the object more unique and valuable. It’s a powerful metaphor for how we can view our own imperfections, making them part of our personal story rather than something to hide, and reminds me of some of my wonderful breast cancer survivor friends who have added the most beautiful tattoos to their mastectomy scars.The Beatles & Their “Messy” Music: Even in pop culture, imperfection has shaped some of the most iconic moments. The Beatles, for example, were known for their innovative, sometimes raw music. Their early recordings were not always perfect by technical standards, but it’s this very “imperfection” that captured the essence of the era and connected them with millions of people. Their willingness to experiment, make mistakes, and keep evolving made them timeless.
Imperfect Heroes: Think about the superheroes our kids adore, like Spider-Man or Iron Man. They're not perfect, far from it. Peter Parker struggles with school, relationships, and finances, while Tony Stark battles his own ego and personal demons. It's their imperfections that make them so relatable and compelling. Their flaws add depth to their character and highlight their growth throughout their stories. Imperfection makes a little it of all of us think we can be a superhero too.
The Value of Imperfection vs. Perfection
If, like Claire with her choreography, rather than wincing and flinching away from our imperfections we embrace them, we might just find something more interesting and valuable than striving for perfection:
Imperfection breeds creativity:
When we let go of the need to be perfect, we open the door to experimentation, growth, and innovation. Perfect solutions often follow a rigid path, but imperfection allows for discovery and creative breakthroughs.Imperfection connects us:
Perfect images or flawless moments may seem aspirational, but they can also feel distant or unattainable. Imperfect moments, whether it's a messy room, a laugh in the middle of an awkward situation, or a candid photograph, create authenticity. They help others see themselves in us (unless my teenager is reading this in which case a messy room doesn’t always work!)Imperfection teaches resilience:
When things don’t go as planned, that’s when we learn the most about ourselves. Imperfections challenge us to adapt, learn, and bounce back stronger. Each mistake becomes a lesson in growth. Personally, I find rummaging around in what went wrong hugely interesting, engaging and satisfying. Weird, I know!Perfection can be isolating:
In some ways, perfection can create isolation. Perfectionism is often rooted in fear, fear of judgment, fear of failure. But embracing imperfection invites others to join us on the journey of life, one where we can share our struggles and victories alike. I often wish more of us felt able to be imperfect on social media, show our scars and flaws rather than air-brushed, filtered, carefully curated images and stories. I’d love social media to be able to be a platform for the real rather than the really unattainable. Its often been the most raw and real, unfiltered and to be honest, uncomfortable, versions of myself in Lump podcast which have opened up the most comment and response from others.
Final Thoughts
I get why perfection still holds a certain appeal, but as I age, I get that less and less. I particularly wish I could find a way to fast track many of our teens and young people into realising the real value lies in imperfection. From art to relationships to the heroes we admire, it’s the flaws and missteps that add character and meaning to our lives. So let’s celebrate our scarred, rough and real bits and build a monument to the idea that to be perfectly imperfect is just perfect.
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